“I think I want to be transformed.”
Hi! I’m Amy 😊🌀
My shift into motherhood was intense. I gave birth to my first son in December of 2020, amidst the isolation and intensity of the Covid-19 pandemic. Birth cracked me open, and then that crack felt like it remained for years. It was one of the best times of my life, getting to know my first child — but I also felt a sense of loss and grief. Goodbye to my childhood, my maidenhood, the person I was before. Hello to someone and something fully new. I felt newborn too.
Five years later, I have two sons, and I feel like I’ve passed through the crucible of matrescence. It took so much longer and required so much more of me than I ever expected — and offered so much more soul and beauty than I had ever expected too.
My second birth was a really important moment for me — returning to the birth space with knowledge of the trial that was waiting for me. It felt deliberate, and difficult. I knew I needed help. It was then that I learned the deep and raw value of doula support for childbirth. A seed was planted deep in me.
My doula practice is called Loon. That’s because, throughout early motherhood, I’ve thought a lot about them.
I wrote the poem I share here in 2020 shortly after my first baby was born. At first I resonated with the way loons dive underwater and swim far away, unseen. I felt like I was deep below the surface. I didn’t know where I would emerge.
Then, I learned that mother loons carry their babies on their backs for weeks after they are born. These mothers have to give up their ability to dive deep alone for a while to keep their babies safe while they grow. This realization floored me. I felt a sense of instant recognition — me too!
I didn’t hear the call to become a doula until I found myself in the birth space, photographing my friend’s birth. It was the same room where I had given birth to both of my sons. The same room where I had moved through the same passage my friend was moving through then. I felt a sudden flash of recognition — this is exactly where I need to be. To witness my friend moving through the threshold of birth, all the challenge and change and surrender and raw love. To stand in that theshold with her, bearing witness, holding space, capturing memories with my camera. It all felt so important, so holy and rare and real. I could have stayed in that room forever, waiting and watching and feeling the energy of transformation. I understood instantly that my life was changing, and that I knew that I needed to step into my call as a birth worker. And now it is such an honor to join you in your birth space, to witness your transformation.
Why all the Mary Cassatt?
I have always been inspired by Mary Cassatt’s portrait practice, and then motherhood shifted that inspiration into near obsession — the way her work centralizes the mother and child as an endlessly worthy subject, elevating ordinary daily caregiving to the realm of fine art. Her work changed the world and has always meant so much to me, and as an artist and doula serving Pittsburgh families, drawing inspiration from a Pittsburgh-born artist feels even more special. Ordinary caregiving is worthy of the artist’s gaze. Childbirth is commonplace, but it is also extraordinary. These small things deserve great attention.
I do want to call out that I wish she had been able to paint more diverse subjects, both racially and economically. Her imagery largely depicts a very white and relatively upper-class experience of motherhood. In that light, I want to reiterate that I believe all mothers and children are equally worthy, all are extraordinary and beautiful and powerful in the mystery of love.
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I have trained with Birthing From Within (Doula + Childbirth Education), and I plan to continue my education through additional training as long as I am serving as a birth worker!
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I am a poet, author of three books, stay at home mom to two boys, and I design sewing patterns! I always have a lot of plates spinning, but I would not have it any other way — and the beauty of all of this work is flexibility and the ability to shift my focus over time. Learn more about my books and other work here!
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I’d been circling around birth work for years, sensing I would find my way here at some point. I think I needed to move fully through my own matrescence first (which took nearly five years!) before I could offer support to others. So much was changing in me over the course of the birth of my two sons. I needed to find some steadiness, and I needed a way in. It wasn’t until I attended my first birth that I felt a sense of inner knowing. My doula and friend invited me to photograph her birth, and the moment I stepped into her birth space I knew — I had entered a new and deeply impactful chapter of my life. Then I dove in to birth work head first!
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My favorite people! My husband, Isaiah, and I have been married for ten years now. We met at the beginning of college and never looked back! 🥰
Our two boys are Tommy (4.5) and Ben (2), and they are just the little loves of my life. We hope to add another child or two to our family over the next few years! All in good time.
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That is my deepest goal, to provide wholehearted support to anyone who seeks it from me. I want to serve with humility and curiosity toward the experiences and identities you come with. All are welcome here.
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Oh my, all over the place! You can check out the main branch of my website for lots of other parts of my work and life — amybornman.com. That should branch out toward all the other non-doula things I’m working on and thinking about!
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Big sigh — I completely understand. In fact, I could not afford a doula for my first birth (though I realize in hindsight I really wish I’d figured out how to have support!). That is why I offer sliding scale rates to all clients. When practicing independently, I am able to offer some flexibility, so please just ask and we can try to figure something out if I am able! Payment plans are also always available. I’m here to work with you.
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Oh my gosh, not at all! All birthing people and all kinds of births can benefit from support! Medicated, unmedicated, spontaneous, induction, cesarean birth — all of it! I want to support you and your birth, however it unfolds. I want to help you find your way to the choices that feel right for you and your family. I have NO opinion about how you should have your baby. I’m here to help you move with confidence through whatever birth and postpartum is yours.
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I’m a deep feeler and a huge reader. I love to know facts and information, but I also really care about the internal experience of change and transformation that birth offers to everyone who passes through. That lens for birth, as a big threshold moment in someone’s life, is what inspires me most and what felt most important to reckon with in my own experience of matrescence. I felt myself changing and growing and expanding as I became a mother, and that change was intense!
Because of this, I’m a somewhat intense doula. I will go as deep with you as you want to go. I’m also pretty personally into physiological birth (because it’s so, so cool!) — but I will always leave the big choices in birth 100% up to you. I’ll be as hands-on or hands-off as you need and want me to be in the birth space, and will always offer my presence and witness first and foremost. You can know that I will be there with you, and ready to offer whatever the moment requires. I am comfortable acting as an advocate in the system when needed (though I will never ever make medical decisions on your behalf). I want to hold space and make space for your birth to unfold however it will. It meant so much when others did that for me. It means so much to offer that to you.